For lack of a better hobby, I put writing “writing” on the
list. However, within 4 years of blogging, I only have 37 entries with around
3,700 page views. Most of my entries were
offshoots of extremely high emotions. I cannot force myself to write. I would
stare at blank pages and blinking cursors. I have started a lot of entries, but
would often fail to complete them. If I force myself, it only takes a few
sentences to lull some readers to sleep. Well there were ten-minute wonders
where I’d vomit words like a sick lady. Words come like crazy so I had to keep
a pen and paper handy. I write on
receipts, tissue paper, or handouts, when I retch. Otherwise, elusive ideas slip
away.
Every year I’d tell myself, “You should read and write more.
You should stop wasting your time. You should practice and read more.” Every
year, I would fail. It probably takes discipline and time management unbearable
to my short attention span. I should probably stop amusing myself with my
Facebook news feed and get my act together.
As usual, I’ll try again this year. Hopefully I’ll be better
this year.